tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-59363592104041182982024-02-06T22:55:10.310-05:00Meow Spoken Here(but it's not always about the kitties)Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11435288847709378577noreply@blogger.comBlogger84125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5936359210404118298.post-67833820305766116152016-07-08T08:36:00.002-04:002016-07-08T09:21:34.532-04:00Summer HarvestAh, yes. The garden is really coming along. We have been blessed with an abundance of summer squash, cucumbers, and finally, tomatoes. There's been some green beans, hot and mild peppers, bell peppers, okra, and a few strawberries as well. There's abundant fresh basil, mint and oregano, and a bit of rosemary, thyme, and catnip! We have three cantaloupes and three watermelons, but not sure they will ever be edible. They are softball to football sized now, so not quite ready to sample.<br />
<br />
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<br />
<br />
Over the warm weather holidays, Chuck really loves to grill. He'll load up on ribs, chicken, and pork tenderloin and become "Grill Master Moe", as his brother Mike called him. So on the fourth of July we had some neighbors over to share the feast, and we've (mostly he!) enjoyed the leftovers the rest of this week.<br />
<br />
Unfortunately the chicken came out very dry. He normally grills it with the skin on, but this time bought chicken breasts with the skin already off. I hate to waste, so came up with this simple recipe last night and it was pretty good! It looked pretty too, but I forgot to take a pic! Thought I'd share.<br />
<br />
Leftover Chicken Italian Style<br />
<br />
2 boneless chicken breasts (if pre-cooked, slice thin)<br />
1 medium summer squash, halved and sliced thin<br />
1/4 cup sweet onion<br />
1/2 cup halved cherry tomatoes<br />
1/4 cup sliced green and red bell pepper<br />
1 jar Ragu (or your favorite Italian sauce)<br />
Fresh Italian style cheese mix, shredded<br />
Chopped fresh basil<br />
Salt and pepper, to taste<br />
<br />
Saute the thin sliced chicken in a bit of olive oil to moisten, along with the onions. Add in the squash and bell pepper until lightly cooked, about 5 minutes. Salt and pepper to taste. Add in sauce and simmer. Add cherry tomatoes and fresh basil, and then top with cheese. Turn off heat and allow flavors to steam together and cheese to melt.<br />
<br />
I served this over multi-grain angel hair pasta and topped with Parmesan cheese with a side of garlic bread.<br />
<br />
Quick and easy, even if you're cooking with fresh chicken. Enjoy!<br />
<br />
<span style="color: red;"><i style="background-color: black;">Kel</i></span><br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11435288847709378577noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5936359210404118298.post-23041252373344752052016-06-24T10:12:00.000-04:002016-07-08T09:21:50.894-04:00Squash It<div class="MsoNormal">
This year’s garden so far has
produced an overabundance of summer squash. With the freezer full, I went searching for another idea. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I love zucchini bread so I
thought, why not use squash? I wanted something with a little less oil and
sugar than some of the recipes on Pinterest, so here’s what I did: <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , serif; mso-no-proof: yes;">Lemon
Squash Bread<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , serif; mso-no-proof: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , serif; mso-no-proof: yes;">½ cup canola oil<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , serif; mso-no-proof: yes;">6 oz unsweetened applesauce<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , serif; mso-no-proof: yes;">6 oz lemon Greek yogurt<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , serif; mso-no-proof: yes;">1 tbsp lemon juice<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , serif; mso-no-proof: yes;">3 eggs<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , serif; mso-no-proof: yes;">3 tsp lemon zest<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , serif; mso-no-proof: yes;">1 cup Stevia (or your favorite sugar substitute)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , serif; mso-no-proof: yes;">1 cup sugar<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , serif; mso-no-proof: yes;">3 cups all purpose flour<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , serif; mso-no-proof: yes;">1 tsp baking soda<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , serif; mso-no-proof: yes;">¼ tsp baking powder<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , serif; mso-no-proof: yes;">1 tsp salt<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , serif; mso-no-proof: yes;">2 ½ cups grated yellow squash (about three mid sized squash)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , serif; mso-no-proof: yes;">1 tsp vanilla extract <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , serif; mso-no-proof: yes;">Glaze<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , serif; mso-no-proof: yes;">1 cup powdered sugar<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , serif; mso-no-proof: yes;">2 tbsp lemon juice<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , serif; mso-no-proof: yes;">Topping<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , serif; mso-no-proof: yes;">2 tbsp lemon zest<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Instructions: <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-left: .5in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]-->1.<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal;">
</span><!--[endif]-->Preheat oven to
350 and coat two loaf pans with Crisco or baking spray. (I use Crisco.)<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-left: .5in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]-->2.<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal;">
</span><!--[endif]-->In a large bowl
cream together oil, applesauce, Greek yogurt, lemon juice, stevia and sugar.
Once combined, add in eggs one at a time, mixing well after each addition. Add
in lemon zest.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-left: .5in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]-->3.<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal;">
</span><!--[endif]-->In a separate
bowl sift together flour, baking powder, baking soda and salt. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-left: .5in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]-->4.<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal;">
</span><!--[endif]-->Add wet
ingredients to dry and mix until combined. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-left: .5in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]-->5.<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal;">
</span><!--[endif]-->Add in squash and
vanilla extract, stir. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-left: .5in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]-->6.<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal;">
</span><!--[endif]-->Divide batter
evenly between loaf pans.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-left: .5in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]-->7.<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal;">
</span><!--[endif]-->Bake for 45
minutes or until toothpick comes out clean. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-left: .5in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]-->8.<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal;">
</span><!--[endif]-->Allow to cool
10-20 minutes in pan and then place on a cooling rack. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Mix lemon juice and
powdered sugar together until combined. Pour glaze over the bread while on
cooling rack. Sprinkle zest over the top of the glaze. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
I was pleasantly surprised
how good this came out. The sweetness and lemon flavor is just right, and the
squash and applesauce give the bread the perfect amount of moistness. I could
eat the whole loaf! ENJOY!<o:p></o:p></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11435288847709378577noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5936359210404118298.post-56553279105329004102015-09-07T21:06:00.001-04:002015-09-09T07:51:51.444-04:00Choices<div style="text-align: center;">
<img src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/1c/db/52/1cdb52a1d41a87e584fcec3eeaf4eda1.jpg" /></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Sigh. I said before that I didn't know if the career change a few months ago would be a short term experience or long-term success. As it turns out it was just short term, but ending it was <b>my</b> choice.<br />
<br />
I never thought I would have to choose between peace in my heart (and gut) and the unlimited potential for income. In this case, the lure of a financially prosperous career just wasn't worth the lack of sleep and emotional and physical pain it was causing.<br />
<br />
Red flags were raised the first week, but I pushed past them. The first conversation about my concerns came after the first month. After convincing me to hang in there, there were several doctors visits over the next month and half due to stress-related issues. We were quickly coming up on the three-month mark, the time I was told we could lock in the partnership or decide to end it. I don't think my partners ever thought I would opt for the latter. They thought if anyone ended it, it would be one of them.<br />
<br />
It's only been a week, and my mind and stomach are so much more at ease. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
I struggled with giving it up not only because of the potential income, but because I didn't want to give up on something that I felt had been brought into my life to help me grow, and maybe I wasn't giving it enough time. But then I started to think - if this was indeed brought to me as a learning experience, did I learn anything - and the answer is yes.<br />
<br />
I learned that I'm more social and have a better business acumen than I thought. I learned about my ability to start something new at the age of 53 and to be good at it. I know now that I can smell a bad deal a mile away, and I can stand up for myself and not be intimidated. And, unlike with my partners, I learned it's not always about the money.<br />
<br />
If it had been about something more than money, we could have continued to work this out because in general, I really loved the job. Our value systems seemed so much alike on the surface but, just like in any relationship, once I dug in, I found out how different we are.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
So, where does this leave me? Not completely without work (or income) at least for now. There are residuals still to be paid from a couple of projects, and I'm also being retained to write blogs for at least one client on a monthly basis. The blogs don't add up to a lot of money, but right now the experience is worth more. I could market myself to other companies as a freelance writer, but my confidence level isn't quite there. I still have a lot to learn. Right now, I believe my future lies in writing rather than going back to transcription. My hub is still on a job search, so the possibility of a move is still on the horizon. There's just a lot of uncertainty right now, but as I said, I am at peace with it.<br />
<br />
What started as a business connection for my husband and turned into a job for me eight months later, has now come full circle within the year and is an answer to a prayer whispered last October. God heard me, allowed me to discover the answer through my experience, and now will continue to lead me where He wants me. This I know for sure.<br />
<br />
So, I'm moving forward into this next week with hope and a plan to swim for the first time in weeks. YES! And giving thanks continuously for the opportunities, failures and successes alike.<br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small; line-height: 18pt;"><i><br /></i></span> <span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small; line-height: 18pt;"><i>Jesus promised us in John 16:13, "But when he, the Spirit of truth, comes, he will guide you into all the truth. He will not speak on his own; he will speak only what he hears, and he will tell you what is yet to come" (NIV)</i></span><span style="line-height: 18pt;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"><i>.</i></span></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11435288847709378577noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5936359210404118298.post-75557606771040128672015-07-22T08:24:00.002-04:002015-07-23T08:14:55.816-04:00It's HotHow hot is it?<br />
<br />
It's so hot, we have no cold water. Really. I even have to add ice to the kitty water bowl.<br />
<br />
And my outdoor plants? Forget it. I water them (evidently with warm water) and they rebound for a bit, but then by the next day they've given up. By August, the yard will be brown.<br />
<br />
Can we move to Maine, or even upstate New York? If it gets hot there, it only lasts a short spell.<br />
<br />
I find myself in situations like this where I just want to escape. My hub is on a job search, and I've put no limits on the geography. I wonder if a new place is on the horizon.<br />
<br />
If you've ever watched House Hunters, you've seen these families that just pick up -little kids and all- and run off to a different country or to an island, for a job or just a slower pace of life. <b>How glorious.</b> But, how do you do it? How do you leave mothers, children, and in my case, a grandchild?<br />
<br />
If you had asked me years ago where I would be when my daughter finally had a baby, I would have told you at least within an hour's drive. And I would keep the baby during the day and work when I could. Those were MY plans. But that hasn't turned out to be the case. I actually only see that precious face in person on average about once a month, and I experience milestones through Instagram and email.<br />
<br />
There have been questions over and over, "Why am I here?" If I acted on my impulses, I wouldn't be.<br />
<br />
So, why not go? Why not do what I want to do. Life is short, right? <br />
<br />
This is where trusting God with my future comes in. Hub and I trusted Him with our move here four years ago and, despite being away from family, it's been the best thing that could have ever happened to us. We know where He leads is for our GOOD.<br />
<br />
But still lately, every day when I wake up I don't know exactly where I belong or what I should be doing. I find myself struggling to trust Him <b>with every moment</b> in order for those impulses to not take over, and to not allow the circumstances of whatever He brings to control how I will react. Because if I run off willy-nilly (as I've done before), it only leads to heartache. I'm old enough to know.<br />
<br />
And even with trusting Him, I make mistakes. I'm not perfect and never will be. I sometimes say and do things that don't come out right, but my heart is in the right place. I hope the people closest to me know this.<br />
<br />
So for today, the focus is just staying on path. Looking forward and not behind. Maintaining joy in the midst of confusion and pain.<br />
<br />
And it's still hot. It's early, but the humidity is already 85%. Have mercy. But, I have to remind myself that just like my plants turning brown, it's just a circumstance. It won't be like this forever.<br />
<br />
And I won't run. My heart and feet are grounded as I await direction.<br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>“His perspective on what troubles me overshadows my anxiety.
Time alone with God prepares me for what I will need throughout the day. He’s
equipping me to handle what is ahead with His gentle boldness, quiet strength
and loving grace”</b><o:p></o:p></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11435288847709378577noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5936359210404118298.post-72088848774876860882015-04-23T09:40:00.000-04:002015-04-26T21:58:02.185-04:00Slaying the Dragon (aka Facebook)Many years ago, before it was at its peak in popularity, I created a Facebook page. This was mostly so that I could keep up with what my daughter and sister were doing, share pictures, etc. Like I said, this was before it turned into the monster that overtakes and complicates lives, which (in my opinion) it is now. <br />
<br />
Before I moved to Greenville, SC in 2011, I deactivated my account. By then, I was growing weary of it anyway and just didn't want to be distracted by it anymore. But once we were settled in our new place and there were pictures to share, I reluctantly created a new page. This was my first mistake.<br />
<br />
At the time I deactivated the old account, I didn't know there was the choice to either <strong>deactivate or delete</strong> a Facebook profile. I just assumed that it would disappear after deactivating. WRONG. It stays out there <strong>forever,</strong> giving you the chance to reactivate it years later if you so choose, and also giving hackers the <em>modus operandi</em> they need to steal your info. I now know I should have just reactivated this account rather than creating a new one after we moved.<br />
<br />
So last fall, in an attempt to simplify my life, I deleted my Facebook account. It was an unnecessary distraction in my life and I was and am glad that it's gone. <br />
<br />
But then, a few months ago my sister texted me, asking if I had reactivated my account. When I said no, she said someone must have "hacked" an old account, because ads for products such as electronics and sunglasses were being sent with my name and an old picture. What? How?<br />
<br />
That's when I knew the original account had never just disappeared and it was back to haunt me. <br />
<br />
So the first thing I needed to do was get the old account deleted. I didn't have the password, and the email attached to the account was closed so I couldn't receive the email from Facebook in order to change the password. I even went as far as contacting the company that provided the old email account, requesting the account be reopened temporarily so that I could get access, but they said it was gone and there was nothing to access. <br />
<br />
Wouldn't you think that with all the technology that Facebook must possess, that their system could figure out when an email is being sent to a closed email account? <br />
<br />
After many tries to guess the password (the hacker must have changed it), many attempts to contact Facebook online (they make it very difficult if not impossible to do so), and messages on Twitter, I resorted to sending a certified letter "snail mail" and requested a signature upon delivery. Yes folks, I was willing to take this to the <em>nth degree, </em>if necessary<em>.</em><br />
<br />
But lo and behold, about a week after the letter was received by them, I received an email from Facebook Community Operations. They wanted me to reiterate the problem (assuming because they wanted to ensure it was me who sent the letter) and then in a second message asked for a picture of a government issued document, such as my driver's license. Once this was done and verified, they said they would delete the account. <br />
<br />
What they did was change my email address on the account and the password, which allowed me to go in and deactivate, then delete the account. Strangely enough, Facebook makes it very difficult for you to delete your profile. I had to Google it to find out how to do it.<br />
<br />
And it worked. I'm so relieved.<br />
<br />
This might not seem like a big deal, but it was to me. The thought of someone using my name, and all the info and pictures associated with the page, just really bothered me. There were tons of people I didn't know on my friends' list, and all kinds of junk had been sent out in my name. I did get a lot of pleasure thinking about the hacker trying to log in to the account and finding out that it was gone! <br />
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Maybe it just comes with getting older, but I'm going to be so much more careful going forward where and with whom I share my personal info.<br />
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So, let this be a lesson. In this day and time, there are so many smart people out there using their time to do bad instead of good and it's too easy to have your identity stolen. Close and delete any unused open accounts be it credit or otherwise, and don't use your debit card online (another lesson learned previously). And if you have a Facebook page, add a second source of access to retrieve your password, such as by text on your cell phone. Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11435288847709378577noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5936359210404118298.post-67253975074893099482015-04-14T18:51:00.001-04:002016-07-08T09:27:47.965-04:00Smart MovesWhen I was 14, I got braces on my teeth for the first time. And they weren't the tiny ones that glue onto the front of your teeth; they were the big ugly ones that wrapped all the way around each tooth and literally had to be hammered on. And I had to wear those things for over <strong>three years</strong>. (They are even in my senior picture!) My teeth were in pretty bad shape, but by the time the braces came off I had a great smile I was proud of.<br />
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So now, some <strike>35</strike> 40 years later, I've noticed how much my teeth have moved, especially in the front. One of my two front teeth has moved forward, and through the years has continued to protrude farther out. My bottom teeth have also crowded up and protrude out, which is pushing the top front tooth out. My husband is not much into details, but even he has even noticed how much my smile has changed. <br />
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I usually don't think twice about doing things for myself such as hair appointments, massages, and pedicures, but having my teeth done <em>again</em> was not something I'd thought seriously about until a couple of months ago. Since we don't have orthodontic insurance, it would be an out-of-pocket expense. So I started adding up the cost of those pedicures and massages (!) and thought, since it's an issue that's only going to get worse, that money would be better spent investing in my teeth.<br />
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Since I've already had the metal kind, I thought Invisalign would be the way to go. (I was willing to go for the tiny metal ones if the cost was unreasonable.) After doing some research online, I called my dentist's office before moving forward. I trust them, and wanted their opinion on how I should proceed, and to also get a referral for an orthodontist they recommend. <br />
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As it turns out, their office offers a new procedure called Smart Moves. It's like Invisalign, but not as intensive or costly. It's mainly for straightening anterior (front) teeth, and like Invisalign, not appropriate for everyone. Since my issues are mostly in the front, I was hoping I'd be a good candidate. After a consultation and finding out this procedure would work for me, and then finding out that the cost is at least <strong>half</strong> of what Invisalign would have been, I felt like this was the way to go.<br />
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After impressions of my teeth and then a couple of weeks for the lab to make my aligners, I returned to my dentist to be fitted. He had to file some space in between a few teeth to give them room to move, which was mostly pressure and not too bad. After that, they popped right in and here's what they look like: <br />
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They do take some getting used to. The first set is called a "hard-soft" material. I slur a little when I talk, and my tongue and sides of mouth are a bit raw in places from some sharp edges. I've been more self conscious about them than I thought I would be. I feel the need to explain, especially when I'm talking directly to someone. <br />
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After the first day, I felt my teeth moving. I'll get my next set of aligners in 2 1/2 weeks, which will be made of a harder material. I'll get a new set every two to three weeks after that for six months, and my dentist guarantees my satisfaction, which is reassuring.<br />
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An added benefit will hopefully be some weight loss. With these in my mouth I'm less likely to mindlessly snack, and I'm mostly drinking water because I have to take them out to drink anything else or to eat. <br />
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I've been getting up in the morning and taking them out and leaving them out until after my coffee, giving my mouth a bit of a break, and then brushing and putting them back in. Overall, I'm wearing them at least 22 hours per day. They are not hard to keep clean. Toothpaste is abrasive, so I'm just using warm water and a toothbrush in the morning and at night, and I take them out several times a day to refresh with cold water and pop back in.<br />
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Wish me luck! Stay tuned for updates and more progress photos...Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11435288847709378577noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5936359210404118298.post-33340471731058056462015-04-10T11:40:00.000-04:002015-04-13T16:48:30.008-04:00Feast and FamineAs a transcriptionist, I've always been blessed with an abundance of work. I've seen comments on the internet about other transcriptionists who were not as fortunate, so I knew I was lucky. Over the past few months it was to the point to where the hospital system couldn't accommodate the number of transcriptionists needed to finish the work, and, along with the doctors who were constantly dictating, the TAT (turn around time) was suffering. I knew changes were ahead.<br />
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A couple of weeks ago we were notified that hospital was changing to voice recognition. This means the doctors are dictating into the new system and, instead of a human (me!) transcribing the reports, a computer is transcribing them. This type of change usually leads to layoffs as transcriptionists are no longer needed, but the hospital instead chose to transition us into voice recognition editors. Editors take the computer reports and proofread and edit them as needed, and then return them to the doctors. It is a different procedure on a newer system and it doesn't require as much typing, so this was good news. After some anxiety about all the changes, I was looking forward jumping in with both feet.<br />
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Well...as it turns out, I haven't had much of a chance, as most of the doctors are now <strong>editing their own reports. </strong>I know this has come as a huge surprise to the company I contract with, and to the hospital. I'm sure they are currently at a loss as to how to proceed since they don't know if the doctors' enthusiasm for the new system will last.<br />
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So, where does this leave me? Right now, I am still working my part-time shift. Most of the time there are "no more files available". A few jobs will trickle in here and there - on the new system and the old. Right now I am still paid an hourly "downtime" when there is no work, so it's just basically staying close by and monitoring the system every 10 minutes. I know this will not last much longer. The hospital will not want to continue to pay us to sit and wait. <br />
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But right now, the silence from the powers that be is palpable.<br />
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Even before this happened, my husband and I had been praying for direction with both of our careers, and for help in seeing open windows of opportunity. I am starting to think about what I'd like to do going forward if it's not transcription or editing work. At one time I thought about going back into an office setting, and at another I considered a position at our church. But having worked independently at home for almost 13 years has left me lacking in confidence to do anything other than what I'm used to. Starting over at 53 would be daunting, but not impossible with God's help. All the more reason to stay aware of His direction for me.<br />
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Just maybe it's the start of something new and better than I could ever imagine...<br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11435288847709378577noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5936359210404118298.post-18592594254089946052015-03-26T09:01:00.000-04:002015-04-09T15:57:46.066-04:00Honestly...It's been a rough week. <br />
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I seem to always fall into a slump whenever I visit family, but am usually able to shake it off. This time I'm in a "pit", and its been difficult to crawl out. <br />
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I think some of it has to do with my work. I was notified last week that the entire dictation system I work with is changing. This was expected to some degree, but I wasn't prepared for it to completely change my job. I've been a medical transcriptionist for 12 years, but now am being trained as a voice recognition editor. There is a part of me that is very happy about this as it adds a new skill set to my resume. It will bring my job into the current century rather than working on an outdated, overrun system. But there is also the part of me that is older and set in my ways and resistant to change. The fact that the company I contract with is also unsure of all of the ramifications of this change has left me feeling somewhat insecure. <br />
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All of this, together with the emotional upheaval of being with family but not having enough time to really enjoy being with everyone and do everything I want to do, has pushed me into despair. I start asking the questions I thought I already knew the answer to, like "Why are we here (in Greenville) and what is my purpose (when I am needed more there)?"<br />
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I know what to do to help me with this situation, so why don't I do it? Wallowing in self pity is not something I allow myself to do very often, but for whatever reason it gives me a sense of control over my life when all I feel is <em>out of control</em>. My husband gets confused, but as long as he knows it's not about him, he can deal - and wait it out. I'm better today than I was on Monday, so he can see a light at the end of the tunnel. <br />
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Deep down, I am angry. I lived close to my family for so long, but it was when they didn't need me as much. Now that they need me, I am too far away to just drop everything and run to them. I used to reason in my mind and <em>trust </em>that it was for the best, but when you're being irrational, all reason goes out the window. <br />
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So, where to go from here? I am praying for understanding. I think I've matured enough spiritually to know that God expects us to have human flaws, and it's ok to get angry and frustrated, but it's not ok to stay that way. All He wants at times like this is for us to realize our need for Him. I need to get back to what I know to be true, and trust that HE knows much better than I about where I belong. <br />
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So I smile and keep moving forward, and just keep thinking about this beautiful, precious boy who calls me Mimi, and is a blonde version of my little girl all those years ago...<br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11435288847709378577noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5936359210404118298.post-41170639700594744612015-03-07T10:25:00.001-05:002015-03-07T12:01:07.866-05:00Rocky Mountain HighWe just returned from a glorious week in Colorado! <br />
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We stayed in a small town about 10 miles outside of Vail called Avon, the home of Beaver Creek Resort where the World Alpine Ski Championships were held just the week before we arrived. Good timing, because it was a relatively quiet week with small crowds. <br />
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I think I was familiar with the name Beaver Creek, since I grew up in the heyday of Wide World of Sports. They were always broadcasting ski competitions from there.<br />
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The drive in from Denver was a bit precarious. We kept saying we were up for an adventure, and we were about to get one. There had just been a huge storm and the roads were a mess, and it was still snowing a little. We had what should have been a two hour drive, though it was slippery at times and dark by then since it took a while to get our rental. Why didn't we take a shuttle and let someone else do the driving? We like being able to do what we want when we want, and because my hub is an online shopping genius, our rental cost less than the shuttle. Luckily we had an SUV, but without 4WD. The biggest fear was not knowing where we were and what was ahead (kind of like life in general, right?) So we just kept it slow and steady and prayed a lot! Once we made it to Avon, the wind was blowing so hard we almost couldn't get the car doors open. It ended up taking just over three hours. We had frazzled nerves, but we were SO happy to be there.<br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-size: x-small;">Waiting for our luggage at DIA - we didn't have a clue!</span></div>
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<span style="color: #666666; font-size: x-small;">The roads looked like this up and down the mountain passes</span></div>
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We are Starwood timeshare owners, so we stayed at the Sheraton Mountain Vista. The location was so great - everything we needed was within a short drive or walk. Our one bedroom condo on the 6th floor was very nice and had everything we needed to live comfortably for the week. The condo was very warm from the heat rising in the building, so most of the time we had a window or the sliding door cracked open. Surprisingly, we never turned on the heat and never used the TWO fireplaces. It was just too warm inside! We ran a humidifier constantly because of the dry air and also the ceiling fans to keep the air moving.</div>
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<span style="color: #666666; font-size: x-small;">View after a heavier snowfall</span></div>
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On our first day, after stocking up on essentials at their lovely Walmart that is nestled in the mountain (everyone was so friendly), we took off to sightsee and get the lay of the land.<br />
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<span style="color: #666666; font-size: x-small;">Why yes, I did take a picture of Walmart!</span></div>
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I'd spent weeks acquiring warm clothing for what we might encounter. We had lows in the 0s and one day it got up to 45, but for the most part it stayed in the 20-30s, but it just didn't feel the same as it does at home. It's a dry cold, and it just doesn't smack you in the face when you walk out the door like it does here (unless the wind was blowing). We were able to bundle up in our ski jackets and hats and walk comfortably for miles in the low temps when the wind was quiet. My $29 Totes boots and $59 Jessica Simpson parka from 6pm.com were the smartest purchases I've ever made. My feet were never cold, and the fur collar and zip off hood on my coat were perfect for all conditions.<br />
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<span style="color: #666666; font-size: x-small;">Our first look at the slopes at Beaver Creek</span></div>
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<span style="color: #666666; font-size: x-small;">Yours truly, contemplating my fate</span></div>
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We skied twice, one day with official lessons and one day without. The first day both of us were fitted incorrectly for our ski boots, and we limped around with too small and too narrow boots thinking this was how it was supposed to feel since we weren't used to them. This is what we looked like after that first ski day: <br />
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<span style="color: blue; font-size: x-small;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgLhKGzPvP5W9L9ZhdF-YGgSI45nRllOZAU4tfs739NeMC07jhV-uULsN4EzP0UD-a6WWH1kQN6HKHq8zgaYSWU2eCMN7qkQivK1K2gEK1jkx7oedQg_4QrlFq97OMoIk13yg4X5EnznL1-/s1600/2015-02-24+16.10.02.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgLhKGzPvP5W9L9ZhdF-YGgSI45nRllOZAU4tfs739NeMC07jhV-uULsN4EzP0UD-a6WWH1kQN6HKHq8zgaYSWU2eCMN7qkQivK1K2gEK1jkx7oedQg_4QrlFq97OMoIk13yg4X5EnznL1-/s1600/2015-02-24+16.10.02.jpg" height="240" width="320" /></a></span></div>
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<span style="color: #666666; font-size: x-small;">Our legs were like noodles</span></div>
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Chuck did better than I did, but I was still proud of myself for lasting as long as I did with sore feet and legs, in the high altitude thin air, and using muscles I hadn't used <strike>ever</strike> in years. <br />
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After a day of rest, we were fitted correctly in our boots and took off for the slopes on our own. What a blast! We put our lessons to the test and, thankfully, stayed upright for the most part. I was even able to figure out the chair lift and actually enjoyed it (after thinking I'd somehow miss the chair or somehow fall getting off, but they really make it easy!) <br />
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There were times that we actually got too warm and had to shed our ski jackets. We noticed a lot of the more experienced skiers were wearing shorter, less bulky ski jackets and layers underneath. I did feel like a stuffed sausage at times with all my gear. Live and learn!<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjD8txXhdI4LN6CCKWCzgsDoznDj8SV9mnHkCJa9NzEsZHoqQwgSRBZTA2lhizDe9iBhTDVQjwVAEAgl284JcGMC_SQpiNc3YiKPuXVNnRuYU-OMsspIp5DNdd-28tyut6U4n6o9L-cgu5x/s1600/2015-02-26+11.41.23.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjD8txXhdI4LN6CCKWCzgsDoznDj8SV9mnHkCJa9NzEsZHoqQwgSRBZTA2lhizDe9iBhTDVQjwVAEAgl284JcGMC_SQpiNc3YiKPuXVNnRuYU-OMsspIp5DNdd-28tyut6U4n6o9L-cgu5x/s1600/2015-02-26+11.41.23.jpg" height="240" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="color: #666666; font-size: x-small;">Thumbs up!</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjr_ZKzY7QFh9IFPmBmGDng4uAz3-X_RwXgoGeLOBw0D2Pmy6w0O7ytzIyYiXi4KH008bt9bgwR6aHIa_CpICQvO-KkZ6T02EcJ2qdkxD2O6L4_8TEqHwucgICgMtndC6sxi49SzKA6NXxI/s1600/2015-02-26+13.26.00.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjr_ZKzY7QFh9IFPmBmGDng4uAz3-X_RwXgoGeLOBw0D2Pmy6w0O7ytzIyYiXi4KH008bt9bgwR6aHIa_CpICQvO-KkZ6T02EcJ2qdkxD2O6L4_8TEqHwucgICgMtndC6sxi49SzKA6NXxI/s1600/2015-02-26+13.26.00.jpg" height="320" width="239" /></a></div>
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<span style="color: #666666; font-size: x-small;">My hub, the phantom skier</span></div>
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<span style="color: #666666; font-size: x-small;">A view from the lift on a clear day</span></div>
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We didn't stay still much during the day, and one day was spent in Vail. There are a couple of villages surrounding the ski slopes, and the day we went to Vail Village it was snowing and so beautiful! We felt like we were in a winter wonderland. They still had evergreen wreaths and bows up in places so it felt very holiday-like.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfzYvejjSWt9iA5Z9BtHsGbDRAshexcXGXV2kL9-XdI3js6Vey4TggCgKBlvlKR_BXdF57U_DrMxL-A6bTvuyzyBWcAfd-fuMdesib8To79s0OI8SgpwBc77xnMarOJxZ3mvgAnSyXFzsR/s1600/2015-02-25+16.55.16.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="background-color: #f3f3f3; color: blue;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfzYvejjSWt9iA5Z9BtHsGbDRAshexcXGXV2kL9-XdI3js6Vey4TggCgKBlvlKR_BXdF57U_DrMxL-A6bTvuyzyBWcAfd-fuMdesib8To79s0OI8SgpwBc77xnMarOJxZ3mvgAnSyXFzsR/s1600/2015-02-25+16.55.16.jpg" height="212" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-size: x-small;">A view of Vail Village</span></div>
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<span style="color: #666666; font-size: x-small;">My handsome hub</span></div>
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<span style="color: #666666; font-size: x-small;">Feeling a bit stuffed, but warm</span></div>
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<span style="color: #666666; font-size: x-small;">Willow Bridge in Vail Village</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhHI7Qb2t1KGBEjMvlIr_0ODBcZMW53rnW9WFuVsUSjL_mfYnj0-AJiW-91dZgZKaJFG9ZpLSG7YQfcNyaNL-LE8638JXeht9UuasR-vQhufnpS03lryCDP3uKS6IxbuWvpInQ8wczWSEpx/s1600/2015-02-28+16.09.31.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhHI7Qb2t1KGBEjMvlIr_0ODBcZMW53rnW9WFuVsUSjL_mfYnj0-AJiW-91dZgZKaJFG9ZpLSG7YQfcNyaNL-LE8638JXeht9UuasR-vQhufnpS03lryCDP3uKS6IxbuWvpInQ8wczWSEpx/s1600/2015-02-28+16.09.31.jpg" height="320" width="239" /></a></div>
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<span style="color: #666666; font-size: x-small;">Lionshead Village</span></div>
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We thought about skiing there but then changed our minds. Since it was our first time, we stuck with what we knew. We know we'll be back and can try the slopes there next time. We shopped, walked for miles, and just enjoyed the beauty of where we were. With every step we just thanked God for the opportunity to be where we were together. It was a special day.<br />
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Our resort had two hot tubs, one indoor and one out. We enjoyed the one outdoors, especially when it snowed. We'd put our bathing suits and sock caps on, take a glass of wine, and sit and chat with other guests while we soaked. Then we'd RUN from the tub in the freezing air into the building and go straight for the eucalyptus steam room, which was hot but so relaxing. I miss that part of the day the most!<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjDdpCoT_mFxeG3KzZe23IxKE6s1iXYvC-0EG4q2Ij5Uz59MgG2gxqpwGwP8y0qN7AREdRbpufxwZo30hcuVU1tZnxh5H_LS0yOMV_rvNxP2jZzPJm54D8U0_XlAKTPRDHOgBjH4Q4Mocnx/s1600/2015-02-28+17.27.02-1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjDdpCoT_mFxeG3KzZe23IxKE6s1iXYvC-0EG4q2Ij5Uz59MgG2gxqpwGwP8y0qN7AREdRbpufxwZo30hcuVU1tZnxh5H_LS0yOMV_rvNxP2jZzPJm54D8U0_XlAKTPRDHOgBjH4Q4Mocnx/s1600/2015-02-28+17.27.02-1.jpg" height="240" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="color: #666666; font-size: x-small;">Our happy spot</span></div>
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We enjoyed so much good food, a lot of rest and a lot of exercise, and just the joy of doing what we wanted every day. Starbucks greatly benefitted from our visit! (Be sure to take a registered gift card and rack up the points!) Most of the time on vacation we are ready to go home by the end of the week. I can't say that we weren't this time because we love our home, but we both felt much more sad leaving. It was that good!<br />
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<span style="color: #666666; font-size: x-small;">At Beaver Creek after a heavy snow</span></div>
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<span style="color: #666666; font-size: x-small;">Pristine beauty</span></div>
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<span style="color: #666666; font-size: x-small;">Happy us</span></div>
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On a side note, we had all kinds of preconceived notions about CO and the legalization of marijuana there. Are there really that many people who take advantage of the new law? Would we smell it? Would we see it sold in stores? What we found were a few stores off the highway that sold it only for medical purposes, one car driving around advertising it for sale elsewhere, and we didn't smell it or see anyone smoking anywhere. I think the media makes a bigger deal of it than it really is.<br />
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After seven nights, we left for a full day of traveling. We finally flew in to Greenville at midnight, and were home by 1:15. After indulging in freshly made donuts (heavenly) and milk from our 24-hour QT, we were finally in bed by 2 a.m. Oh, and I lost 4 pounds on the trip. Yay me!<br />
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This little girl was so happy to see mommy and daddy. <br />
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Thank you, Colorado for the best vacation and for the happiest memories made. We will be back!<br />
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<span style="background-color: black;"></span><br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11435288847709378577noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5936359210404118298.post-32695013130715841492015-01-26T10:45:00.001-05:002015-01-26T10:45:44.751-05:00Moving ItI've never been a gym person. As a matter of fact, I've really not exercised much my entire life, which has led to just having an average, lately mushy, body type. Just like most people, I get inspired at the beginning of the year or if I hear about a new fad. Last year I tried a low carb <em>lifestyle</em>, not diet, and stuck with it religiously for a few months and lost about 8 pounds, but then slacked off, and I didn't combine it with exercise. I still don't each much bread, but my downfall is cereal. It's actually supper a day or two each week at times.<br />
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Anyhoo...my husband has been going to the gym for the past couple of weeks while I've been working in the evening (boo!), and he said the gym has acquired a few new toys since my last visit, namely rowing machines. So, since I was feeling the need to <em>move </em>this weekend, we took off for the gym together this past Saturday. <br />
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After the obligatory 15 minutes on the treadmill to get my heart rate going, I then attempted rowing. It's intimidating at first, so my husband set it up for me. I started rowing and was thinking, why is this so easy? Do I have it set to low? And then I just kept going and going. I was amazed! (The only problem I did have was my right hand going to sleep, but this may have been from holding the handle too tight). My husband was on the stair climber looked over at me and couldn't believe it. He assumed I would not last as long as I did (and I'm always pleased when I'm stronger than he thinks I am). I was sweating, and my muscles were burning. I believe this is the first time I've ever surpassed what I thought I could do physically without actually giving up. <br />
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Do you know that feeling? It just makes you want to KEEP going! Have I found the holy grail of exercise (for me)? We shall see.<br />
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This is not me below, but this is the exact machine at our gym. After reading the article below, I realized my technique was not exact (which may have led to the numb hand) but I can feel that it was effective.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjbHvhBQIkgxPNFx58JSPXSaPLNsXFw5oAA1vuKxS4s8JqB9jo0IWxmpExUpbHAPmNqTMxmslAaQ6f1WRIzou9PyFML17BM9EogSfqJYa80OwM1_7MCpJAW7iqJjTAYxw0MMPak-lbBqq-/s1600/rowing.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjbHvhBQIkgxPNFx58JSPXSaPLNsXFw5oAA1vuKxS4s8JqB9jo0IWxmpExUpbHAPmNqTMxmslAaQ6f1WRIzou9PyFML17BM9EogSfqJYa80OwM1_7MCpJAW7iqJjTAYxw0MMPak-lbBqq-/s1600/rowing.jpg" height="205" width="320" /></a></div>
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<a href="http://www.popsugar.com/fitness/Tips-Using-Rowing-Machine-3019487?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed:%20fitsugar%20(FitSugar%20-%20Healthy,%20happy%20you.)&utm_content=Google%20Reader">http://www.popsugar.com/fitness/Tips-Using-Rowing-Machine-3019487?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed:%20fitsugar%20(FitSugar%20-%20Healthy,%20happy%20you.)&utm_content=Google%20Reader</a><br />
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The fact that I went back to the gym on Sunday is testament to how much I love this workout! <br />
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And I think that's the key. We're all different, and we have to find what works for us. If we can find a way to move out bodies and enjoy it, we'll stop making so many excuses not to do it.<br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11435288847709378577noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5936359210404118298.post-16637544836626146552015-01-04T09:07:00.001-05:002015-01-04T09:10:18.171-05:00It's a New Year again!Oh wow, Happy New Year! When I read my last post from January of LAST YEAR, I can actually see a bit of change in myself. I suppose that's the most we can hope for is that we can grow in a positive direction from year to year. <br />
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This year has started out rough with sickness. I'm not the type that usually gives in to the crud, but it has knocked me for a loop this time. It started with a glob in my throat that gave me laryngitis for three days. Thinking I was getting better instead of worse, I did not go to my Dr. in between the holidays. By the time it had moved into my chest and then back up into my head, it was Jan. 2 and her office was closed. Riding it out one more day with new over the counter meds didn't help, so by Sat. morning I was first in line at the neighborhood express clinic. They were wonderful, and with some new antibiotics for bronchitis, sinus infection, and conjunctivitis (the sinus infection affected my eyes), I'm feeling much better 24 hours later. Now though, my sweet hub is a few days behind me with his symptoms and although he also went to the clinic yesterday, he seems a bit worse off today. Its damp and rainy anyway, so we'll just hunker down one more day and nurse ourselves back to a somewhat healthy state. <br />
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As usual, the new year has brought on thoughts of getting into shape. I said last year I'm heavier than I've ever been, and I'm at least in the same place or a couple of pounds ahead of that now. As it does when we get older, the fat "shifts" into different places and this is what has made me most uncomfortable. When I see someone jogging, or a commercial for Nordic Track, I am inspired, but when it comes down to doing it, I'm just a big blob. Today will be dedicated to putting together a food plan for the next week so we can focus on eating better, so that's a start. I don't think it's so much the volume of what we eat, but the poor choices. Also, I sit a lot with my work and this doesn't help. <br />
<br />
For Christmas, I bought my husband a Fit Bit. He loves it, and tracking his steps, sleep patterns, and what he eats has been so easy with this. I think this would be helpful for me as well so I may add this one more purchase to the after Christmas budget. <br />
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On another note, my grandson has grown to a precious 15-month-old bundle of cuteness... <br />
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Oh, just look at that gorgeous kid! I see so much of my daughter Ashley in that little face, but she had dark curls when she was his age. The blonde comes from his daddy. I sure miss being with him, but have also learned over the past few months to give up the stress I was putting on myself by trying to control my daughter with too much input when it comes to raising him. She and his daddy are completely capable, and my role is to be a supporter when she needs me. Hey, he's my first grandchild and it just took a little time to find my place, even three hours away. <br />
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Wishing everyone a blessed and positive start to 2015!<br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11435288847709378577noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5936359210404118298.post-40091844764705138982014-01-16T11:10:00.002-05:002014-01-16T11:30:08.274-05:00Resolved to ResolveI am consistently inconsistent.<br />
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I would love to be on an even keel. Are there people out there that really are, or do they just <em>look</em> like they are? I can't fake it. <br />
<br />
As much as I try to focus on my faith and pray and do all the things I know I should, I find myself questioning where I am in life and what I'm doing. Maybe it's a New Year's thing. And then I feel guilty because maybe I'm not trusting God the way I should. <br />
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I always have the best of intentions. I want to get in shape. I want to further my experience in my field. I want to become a better volunteer, better cook, better wife, etc. but I rarely follow through for long periods. My attention span has me jumping from idea to idea when one of them does not satisfy. But will anything satisfy if I'm working towards the wrong thing? <br />
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I'm now menopausal and severely lacking in energy. I'm heavier than I've ever been. I've heard of women going through all of this but never thought it would affect me the way it has. But, is this truly the problem?<br />
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I started reading a book last year, I think it was called The Happiness Project, and the main idea is <strong>finishing what you start</strong> and you will be happier. I really think I could benefit from this, but I haven't finished the book. See a trend? <br />
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My heart feels pulled in different directions. My dad passed last year and my mom is still struggling, and my grandson was born last Sept. They're all in GA. I always thought when I had a grandchild that I would be able to keep him or her while Ashley works. I love my husband and my home, but I also want to be three hours away.<br />
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All of this leaves me feeling ambivalent about my life. I'm unsettled and uninspired when I want to be filled with joy and working towards a goal. I want to know that I'm doing what I was meant to do. I'm almost 52 and it doesn't feel like I am. <br />
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My (thankfully extremely supportive) husband and I have talked and he feels that I take on too much of the stress of others. I worry for my mom, for my daughter and her family, and for my own life here. It just becomes too much. <br />
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So, if I'm supposed to be at peace and not worry and put everything in God's hands, then how come it is so hard for me? There are times that I feel close to God and others when I feel so far away. This makes me anxious and depressed at the same time. <br />
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So, this week I am taking a step back. So far, I've done very little and have tried to read and pray and get my thoughts in order. Ashley and Brooks are coming for a visit and I hope this will lift my spirits.<br />
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I read something at the beginning of the week that makes a lot of sense: "Honor God. Serve that single objective and everything else will fall into place". So, that's my only resolution this year - since that one should take care of all of the above.<br />
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<em>Lord, I pray for clarity in my thoughts and peace in my heart. Help me to see what I can do each day to honor You, so that You will point my footsteps in the right direction. Amen.</em><br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11435288847709378577noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5936359210404118298.post-34390551229672720812013-11-26T20:24:00.000-05:002013-11-27T07:36:36.137-05:00Ramblings from the HeartI've never been a secure person, especially when I was younger. I might have looked sure of myself, but it was only a façade. Behind it, I was scared to death. I put up a shield of protection and was very aloof. This shield and my fear kept me apart from others. I had difficulty making friends.<br />
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Part of my anxiety is that there is a part of my body that is different from anyone I've ever known. Because this difference was pointed out by school mates, "friends", and even in disgust by my paternal grandmother (as if it was something I had any control over), this only intensified my insecurity. It's exhausting living life trying to hide a part of your body.<br />
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I looked for attention in all the wrong ways. I felt shame and didn't like myself very much as a young adult.<br />
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As I got older, I focused on advancing in my career. I thought this is what I needed to help me to feel better about myself. I would puff up with all of my accomplishments and tried to find my worth in <em>what I did,</em> when I needed to find it in <em>who I am</em>. <br />
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It's only been in recent years that I've truly been able to understand my true worth is based on. It is not my job, the shape my body is in, how I dress or how my hair looks, who my friends are or how much money I have. My worth comes from my relationship with Christ.<br />
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I've learned that God loves me no matter what. I don't have to do anything to earn this love. I am His child and He loves me, and that will never change. When I sin (I am human - it's inevitable), He doesn't love the sin but still loves ME.<br />
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I've had a hard time accepting this because I haven't always felt lovable. I've made mistakes in the past and didn't understand how God could love me. I used to think He sat in constant judgment of me and rained down punishment for my past sins. <br />
<br />
Instead, I'm learning that we worship a merciful God. A never changing God who I believe is GOOD, and I believe the promises that He has made to all of us.<br />
<br />
<strong>1. He promises to supply every need we have.</strong> <br />
<br />
This does not include the multiplicity of luxuries that we have come to think of as needs. We have to learn to be happy with what He provides, and allow Him to work in our lives and bless us with more if this is what He desires for us. <br />
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<strong>2. He promises that His grace is sufficient for us.</strong> <br />
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He has made provision for our salvation by His grace through faith. <em>It is through obedient faith that we have access into the grace of God.</em> <br />
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<strong>3. God promises that His children will not be overtaken with temptation.</strong> <br />
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He assures us a way of escape will be provided. No matter what situation you might be in, there will be a way out. Save yourself heartache and look for it. Put your relationship with God and what He wants for you above immediate gratification.<br />
<br />
<strong>4. God has promised us victory over death.</strong> <br />
<br />
He first resurrected Jesus by way of assuring <em>our</em> resurrection. <br />
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<strong>5. God has promised that all things work together for good to those who love and serve Him faithfully.</strong><br />
<br />
It may be difficult for us to see and understand how this is accomplished at times, for instance when I watch my mom suffer over the death of my dad, or how two of my friends are watching their grandchildren suffer with cancer. But only HE knows what lies ahead. We only see the here and now. He sees the big picture. He promised it, and He will deliver. <br />
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<strong>6. God has promised that those who believe in Jesus and are baptized for the forgiveness of sins will be saved. </strong><br />
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Baptism is the outward expression of our inward transformation.<br />
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<strong>7. God has promised His people eternal life.</strong> <br />
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This life is only temporary. I believe our real home is in Heaven. <br />
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I'm 51 years old and I'm still a work in progress. My emotional self is learning to be submissive to the spiritual. <br />
<br />
I'm still insecure, but not as much. I reach out to people more easily now. I try not to focus on what is wrong, but what is right within me. I still have bad moments but they don't last as long as they used to. <br />
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Being a Christ follower doesn't always make life easier. Bad stuff still happens. For me, at least, it makes the inconsistencies of life easier to handle when you put Him in charge. In the spirit of the season, I am thankful for this most of all.<br />
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<em><span style="font-size: x-small;">O Lord, You are so good, so ready to forgive, so full of unfailing love for all who ask for Your help.</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-size: x-small;">Psalms 86:5</span></em>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11435288847709378577noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5936359210404118298.post-82464087686068178892013-11-06T14:21:00.000-05:002013-11-06T14:29:37.669-05:00Just call me Mimi<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="background-color: blue; color: orange;"><strong></strong></span> </div>
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<span style="background-color: blue; color: orange;"><strong></strong></span> </div>
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: blue;"><strong>Brooks Harold Gillespie</strong></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: blue;"><strong>9/23/2013</strong></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: blue;"><strong>9 pounds, 8 ounces</strong></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: blue;"><strong>20 3/4 inches</strong></span></div>
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<img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDxwZRGEboXxpyBmLJpkW7fySHSY02IfOjIMS3Bkb-ouBV1l_t3ophITxqTIqYu1y39ozwVGJu0HFJ9bfYteSapVgDm7Iiaq63afljvC0iK5gtie4fDsaDP8-a8AtdjeOdpt380NNqEvtc/s320/2013-09-23+20.07.52.jpg" width="320" /></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Proud mommy and baby Brooks. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Isn't she gorgeous within hours of a C section?</span> </div>
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Well, life since 9/23 hasn't been the same! </div>
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I feel like I'm in a constant state of flux, wanting to be at home with my husband yet wanting to be with my daughter and grandson, too. There is such a draw to be with them, but they are three hours away. He's six weeks old now and so far I've been maintaining an every 2-3 week schedule. I'm SO looking forward to being with them again tomorrow!</div>
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The past couple of weeks have been a little rough. We thought at first he just had gas, then reflux, but I believe now it's full blown colic. I hope the newest remedy he started yesterday will be effective. Ashley and JG are quite the parenting team, although their confidence wanes when Brooks is inconsolable. Between me, the in laws, my mom and my sister, they have lots of support around. Even so, I know Ashley prefers her mama, and I love that.</div>
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From what I understand, he's starting to smile and coo a lot. Until now, he's been such a serious little guy. </div>
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Here are more pictures through the weeks: </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh3ffe3NiAWECZxLeUu_NdyZnH5MRk0FMd4aLw68o0iwNUkJZIXksjX6JTFvizYMYeLa_SllY7XY8jnCBbc5GeG-YBuUhZr0oT-_-N06T-7Nl9lN2AvA1vRId_IQZTaWC7tPevOMCB6fGke/s1600/2013-09-24+11.54.04.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh3ffe3NiAWECZxLeUu_NdyZnH5MRk0FMd4aLw68o0iwNUkJZIXksjX6JTFvizYMYeLa_SllY7XY8jnCBbc5GeG-YBuUhZr0oT-_-N06T-7Nl9lN2AvA1vRId_IQZTaWC7tPevOMCB6fGke/s320/2013-09-24+11.54.04.jpg" width="212" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPZIz_BI0qS7QN2jyV-vJUFT4jIiIVlPwX82JxYXgt77T_1Kv11CrZLvgySWDPxQ7wTVk_HXkHZ5e1WMNvp5pZTDsapUNO3AWjVs8swQZCvSd1A7mfp3frAIYtSWSlVT7hDM2Aiv5RgOOw/s1600/2013-09-28+21.36.35.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPZIz_BI0qS7QN2jyV-vJUFT4jIiIVlPwX82JxYXgt77T_1Kv11CrZLvgySWDPxQ7wTVk_HXkHZ5e1WMNvp5pZTDsapUNO3AWjVs8swQZCvSd1A7mfp3frAIYtSWSlVT7hDM2Aiv5RgOOw/s320/2013-09-28+21.36.35.jpg" width="212" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgWesUMdtS1_UiL-Ow8dKDRsyE2s_NNhQrOyUuHRNcSh6OOW2D418vDEXShyphenhyphen0KslK0HKQiAUqFWZXmx3FUMFNcs7Qn0TRAO2uOm2uKrF2lUS9QaQ1ctZm5p0UAh4yAC7ElZQ9ui0fYBr_hD/s1600/2013-09-29+15.22.35+(2).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgWesUMdtS1_UiL-Ow8dKDRsyE2s_NNhQrOyUuHRNcSh6OOW2D418vDEXShyphenhyphen0KslK0HKQiAUqFWZXmx3FUMFNcs7Qn0TRAO2uOm2uKrF2lUS9QaQ1ctZm5p0UAh4yAC7ElZQ9ui0fYBr_hD/s320/2013-09-29+15.22.35+(2).jpg" width="212" /></a></div>
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Everyone thinks he looks just like his daddy, but I see his mommy in him, too. </div>
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Mimi to the rescue!</div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11435288847709378577noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5936359210404118298.post-85150779074895750192013-09-19T19:27:00.001-04:002013-11-06T14:00:55.218-05:00Waiting for Brooks<span style="font-family: Georgia; font-size: x-small;"><strong>When a child is born, so are grandmothers ~ Judith Levy</strong></span><br />
<br />
So, on Monday I will finally be a Gramma!<br />
<br />
Buy Buy Baby, Babies R Us, TJ Maxx, Ross and WalMart have benefitted greatly from this status change.<br />
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Ashley and JG have been married for seven years, so we've been waiting a while for this.<br />
<br />
His name is Brooks. We've seen him on 3D ultrasound so we have an idea of his little face, but I'm so anxious to see what/who he really looks like. And we're all anxious to know how much he weighs. Ashley jokingly says there's likely a betting pool between the doctor, midwife, and sonographer since he's been estimated at everything between 6.9 lbs. - 10 lbs. I think it will be toward the 10. <br />
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I fully expect him to be a little chunk just like his mama was. <br />
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I'm excited about seeing my daughter and son in law become parents. It took Ashley's maternal instincts a while to kick in, while JG has wanted to be a daddy since year one of their marriage. They are both going to be awesome. I have enjoyed watching my daughter blossom into the nurturer I knew she would be, and I love hearing her call her baby boy "buddy". <br />
<br />
Ashley is having a C-section. This has been expected all along so it was no surprise.<br />
She is small boned, and her pelvis is much too narrow to birth even an average sized baby. A couple of her friends have had them so she's been getting lots of advice.<br />
<br />
I told her when I was in labor with her and on my way to the hospital, it occurred to me that I hadn't given much thought about HOW they were going to get her out of me! I must have had pregnancy brain and never really focused on how the baby would actually get here. And in 1982, there just wasn't as much information as there is now so other than what my mom told me, I didn't have much to go on. I was SCARED! (And btw, I had her naturally with NO drugs! GO me!)<br />
<br />
Well, Ashley has reached that point now and is starting to get nervous. The one thing about it being a C-section is that I won't be in there with her. JG has a weak stomach, so I hope he'll be able to remain upright :) I know there will be lots of tears (and not just from the baby!)<br />
<br />
I'll be staying with her for at least a week after she gets home, and I know those are going to be the best days <strong>ever</strong>. We live three hours away so I won't be able to be with her constantly after that. We'll be doing a lot of Facetime on our iPhones, but I'm sure we'll both be back and forth a lot. <br />
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Life as we know it is going to change. I'm ready! Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11435288847709378577noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5936359210404118298.post-18218151085003576422013-08-12T13:03:00.003-04:002013-11-06T13:59:07.515-05:00Believing a Lie<span style="font-size: x-small;"><em>Don't believe the lie that YOU can't make a difference -</em> Perry Noble</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"></span><br />
For almost a year, I volunteered in our church office working with the production crew. I was responsible for inputting the words to the songs to be projected on the big screens every Sunday morning, and I loved it. I was able to hang out with a lot of the really young and creative people there and it made me feel good to contribute with the gifts God has blessed me with. <br />
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But, there was always that voice in the back of my head that said I wasn't needed and wasn't appreciated. Even at the age of 51, I still fall victim to Satan and his tricks. I was believing the lie. This made it easy for me to back off when my dad died, and I told them I just wasn't going to be available regularly anymore in order to do this. <br />
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This wasn't all together true. There was a three-week period of time that I was wrapped up in helping my mom, but lately it's been more sporadic and something I can schedule. It should still allow me to do something I love for my church. But, I was afraid to ask if they wanted me back. <br />
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I know in my heart and head that if I put these things in God's hands, He will take care of it. As it turns out, the person who was supposed to take my place never showed, and a busy production employee was handling the task. When I finally got the nerve to ask about it, I was told they would "love" me to come back.<br />
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I've just felt all along that this volunteer assignment was for me. At my former church was where I first learned about production. I had hoped it would lead to an opportunity at NewSpring (my current church) and it did. And as much as I loved doing it, I still became discouraged. I think they understood when my dad died that it threw me into a tailspin. But still, that wasn't 100% of the reason. <br />
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I'm thankful to be back to my Tuesday volunteer routine, and I pray that I can learn from this experience and not listen to the negative whispers of the enemy. I know if I persevere, God can use me in more ways than one to accomplish His purposes through this. Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11435288847709378577noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5936359210404118298.post-20072108132051273642013-08-07T16:18:00.003-04:002013-11-06T13:59:28.946-05:00A Summer of Change<br />
I wrote my last post in June but somehow missed publishing it. So much has happened since then. When I wrote it, I had no idea that just 10 short days later my father would pass away.<br />
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It was June 13, 2013. My dad had been sick for the past couple of years with COPD and emphysema, but no one in my family expected it to end his life so quickly. It was such a strange turn of events. He was healthy enough to help my mom through her back surgeries in late 2012 and early 2013, although it stressed his system a lot. And then, a new heart doctor thought he had a right heart valve leak that was exacerbating his breathing issues, and he put him on a new medication for that. Unfortunately, it was the wrong diagnosis and the wrong type of medication, and it ended up sending him to the hospital for a week in April. After that, he got better for a very short period and then started going downhill...<em>fast</em>. We knew he was sick, but we just couldn't <em>accept</em> to what extent. He passed away after struggling to breathe while getting up that morning. It has been devastating for my family, especially my mom, but God is merciful in not allowing him to suffer any longer. <br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">He was a handsome, cool dude</span></div>
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So, the past seven weeks have been spent helping my mom continuously with everything from changing names on accounts to balancing her checkbook to encouraging her daily and allowing her to grieve. All in all, she is doing much better this week. I am thankful for our faith, and knowing that God is with her (and me!) every step of the way.<br />
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Then, on July 27, we returned home from an overnight trip to my mom's and couldn't find my 16 year old kitty, Mason. He ended up being stuck in the litter box because he couldn't move his back legs. It was a Saturday evening, so we had to take him to the emergency vet. We were told that he "threw a clot" (evidently something older kitties do) and they could fix him but it would likely happen again and we needed to consider his quality of life. Going to the vet has always been a traumatic experience for him and we didn't want him to suffer any longer. My husband and I had an hour or so waiting for the vet to discuss our options, and we thought it best to let him go. We had the opportunity to spend time with him and tell him what a good boy he was and how much we loved him. They gave him a shot to relax him and we stayed with him throughout the procedure. There were many tears. That little guy had been with me through so many life changes and it was hard to imagine what life would be like without him. But, we knew he'd been in pain with arthritis and mild kidney failure and it wouldn't have been fair to make him suffer anymore just for our sakes. We had him cremated alone, and now have his ashes. The emergency vet was wonderful and compassionate, and they also made paw prints in clay for us. <br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Rest in peace, my angel kitty</span></div>
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We had no idea that Mason's absence would have such an effect on our 11-year-old kitty, Maddy. She and Mason had not been close for quite some time. Mason was crotchety as he got older, and Maddy was always too spunky for him. They ignored each other for the most part for the past several years. But there was obviously a stronger bond than I realized, as Maddy is now grieving him terribly. It took her about 5-6 days to realize he was really gone, and then she started to get sick. I took her to the vet yesterday to make sure it wasn't anything physical and they did blood work, treated her for dehydration, and wormed her just in case she had a parasite since she had, to put it nicely, bowel issues and has been making a mess with it around the house for the past few days. As it turns out, the blood work came back normal and it's just the grieving process that she's going through. I wish there was more I could do for her other than love on her and then give her space when she wants it. She did finally eat this morning but is still very withdrawn. If anyone has any suggestions, please let me know. <br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Miss Boo sleeping on my desk</span></div>
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It is my hope that the rest of this summer will be non-eventful. We have a much needed long weekend trip to the beach coming up, and our first grandbaby will be here soon after in Sept. A season of joy and calm in my favorite time of the year, fall, would be ideal, but I know I'm not in control. I just continue to pray for patience and trust as God shapes us into who He wants us to be. <br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11435288847709378577noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5936359210404118298.post-24774703233776339222013-08-07T15:20:00.001-04:002013-11-06T13:56:08.472-05:00Reminiscing and projectingOriginally written June 3, 2013 but not posted...<br />
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I find myself lately thinking a lot about the past and when I was raising my daughter alone. They were hard days mostly, but I loved it, too, especially as she got older.<br />
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I listen to Pandora radio while I'm working, and a lot of the songs she used to listen to as a teenager often come across my playlist. I can see her getting ready for school in the morning, music blaring, and hearing her singing along to Madonna and The Dixie Chicks (this was in the 90s, y'all). My sweet girl. <br />
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She's pregnant now and expecting my first grandbaby, a boy whose name is Brooks. She's been married for almost seven years, so we've waited a long time for him! The thought of what it will be like to see her and JG as parents, and the thought of Chuck and I being grandparents fills me with joy...and makes me want to be closer to them.<br />
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We live three hours away - and it's not an easy drive having to go through Atlanta traffic to get to them. An ideal location for them would be farther north, closer to both sets of grandparents. And I don't think either of them disagree, even as much as JG loves his job. He's a golf course superintendent in a very nice golf community and, aside from the very hot, dry summers, he's got a great job. But, the prospect of moving closer to his family, I think, makes him happy, as well as having Ashley closer to me. It might be worth looking for some other greens to tend to. <br />
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And Ashley's job is very stressful, and I think it's not something that is going to mean as much when there's a little one to take care of. It would be nice to get her away from the anger and frustration she experiences daily. <br />
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Our children may grow older and create lives for themselves, but for me anyway, there is always that draw to be with her. I know God has us here for a reason, and I have to trust that He will make things work for all of us. <br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11435288847709378577noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5936359210404118298.post-82242982971049140812013-02-28T20:38:00.000-05:002013-03-01T07:42:42.867-05:00A Rite of PassageLast year I turned 50. There are certain things that come with this<em> '</em>tender'<em> </em>age, one being a colonoscopy screening. <br />
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I put this off for a while. After all, who wants to voluntarily subject themselves to such a personally invasive procedure? Because my issues stem from a lazy bowel, the aging process and perimenopause have only intensified my symptoms. Most insurance now covers colonoscopies as preventive care and my insurance covers it 100%. I had no excuse. <br />
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So, after being sick with the flu back in December, my body determined for me that it was time for this. After finding a great gastroenterology doctor back in January, the procedure was scheduled for today, February 28. <br />
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So, I'm here to tell you that I SURVIVED, and the process wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be. I want to share my experience in hope that this post will help anyone who has also put this off out of fear or embarrassment. <br />
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MY SUGGESTIONS: <br />
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1) Start preparing yourself the week of the procedure, not just the day before. The day of the prep you will be on a clear liquid diet. AT LEAST one day before then, limit yourself to light foods high in protein such as yogurt and eggs. This will help sustain you and keep you from having as much to expel, which will make the experience much easier. <br />
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2) Shop for prep day items ahead of time. I bought mango and peach jello, apple juice, Gatorade, ginger ale, popsicles, hard candy, and Lipton dry chicken soup mix. Of course, I didn't need all of this - but since I was so limited in what I could have, I wanted a variety. I bought the chicken soup mix instead of just chicken bouillon because the flavor is much better, and then just strained the noodles out. I sipped this in the morning along with eating jello, and then again at lunch. And in the middle of the afternoon, I ate hard candy to keep my blood sugar up. By the evening I was drinking the prep mix and didn't want to eat much of anything during that. <br />
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Yes, you will be hungry but not painfully so. I'm the kind of person who usually grazes most of the day so I didn't think I would do well. But I just kept my mind focused on the goal - a clean scan - and prayed for strength. <br />
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3) The hardest part for me was the liquid prep mix. My doctor prescribed MoviPrep. Some doctors prescribe a large bottle of Miralax mixed with a gallon of Gatorade. The MoviPrep is a prescription and is a low volume prep, meaning you only have to drink two liters over several hours. And no, it doesn't taste good. It reminded me of lemon scented kitchen cleaner. I tried mixing in dry orange drink mix, but it seemed to intensify the flavor instead of mask it, so with the second batch I left it plain. What helped me was to drink the mixture with a straw as far back in my throat as I could put it and then take a large drink and not breathe in, which kept me from tasting it so much. Then I would "chase" that drink with some flavored sparkling water. It was directed that I drink 8 oz. every 30 minutes until the first liter was gone, then wait an hour or so to start the next liter, and again 8 oz. every 30 minutes. In between the 30-minute intervals, I ate hard candy (Lifesavers and Werthers hard caramels). I was instructed to start the prep at 5 p.m., and I was really afraid that starting so late that I was going to be up all night. Instead, I was finished by 11 p.m. and was able to sleep uninterrupted for the most part. <br />
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Do try to schedule your procedure for early in the morning. I was lucky enough to be the first one of the day and arrived at the hospital at 7 a.m. By 7:45, they had me prepped in the outpatient area with an IV in my hand. By 8:10, they were starting the procedure and I was OUT, snoozing and pleasantly dreaming. The next thing I knew, I was waking up to my husband's smiling face about 30 minutes later. And I've never been more relieved in my life than when the doctor told me that all was well. After drinking some Sprite and recovering for about 30 minutes, I was up and dressed and out the door. <br />
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And the happiness I felt when it was all over - priceless! We stopped at McDonald's for a southern chicken biscuit and then later for lunch, my sweet hub went to one of our favorite restaurants and got me a caprese sandwich and homemade potato chips. And as you can imagine, the food never tasted better.<br />
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So here I sit on the same day, a little tired but so relieved and happy that I don't have to repeat the process for five years. And next time, I won't be afraid because I'll know exactly what to expect. Having the peace of mind of knowing the issues I've had are not because of disease has freed me to plan ahead for my future, which includes my first grandbaby this fall!<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11435288847709378577noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5936359210404118298.post-17955957912588110802013-02-04T13:21:00.000-05:002013-11-06T14:00:24.065-05:00Dear IAW...It was five years ago today that you opened. <br />
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It was 2 1/2 difficult years and 200k + later that you closed. <br />
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It's time to say goodbye for good. You've occupied my mind for too long, making me feel guilty about your failure. I'm tired of beating up the person I was back then. I need to move on.<br />
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I admit it - I was part of the problem. I hated you from the first month that you were open. You were not what I expected and I wanted out. You were mainly my husband's idea and I became angry at him too for how he pushed you on me. <br />
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The concept of you was exciting for a little while. There was a part of me that wanted to be the person who could successfully own and run you. I wanted to be more outgoing and involved in our community, even though that's not really my personality. I thought in so many ways that all of my life I had failed at being who I was and maybe if I <em>changed</em>, I would be happier and I would feel better about myself.<br />
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The possibility of you failing and how that would make me feel never entered my mind. <br />
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We made so many poor choices with you. Sometimes we hired the wrong people to help us. Sometimes we spent too much money on things that didn't matter. At our age we were experienced enough to know these things but still did them wrong. We didn't listen closely enough to God when He surely tried to guide us. There are so many things I would now do differently.<br />
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You cost us our retirement and a chunk of our personal monthly budget for a while. My heart knows that we need to trust that God will provide rather than depend upon a nest egg, but it's still a disappoinment.<br />
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But all in all isn't it most important that we learn from our experiences, especially the bad ones? And learn, we have. Mistakes with you have helped both of us many times in our work as we've moved forward. And I've learned that I can be happy being me rather than trying to change.<br />
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So, instead of feeling guilty or feeling I've failed, maybe I should be thankful for you. Thankful for the experience, thankful for the people we helped through you, and thankful that God delivered us from what could have been a much more messy resolution of you.<br />
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So, as an exercise in letting go, I write this farewell to you. I will not speak of you or allow the negative aspects of you to interfere with my thoughts anymore. Rest in peace, IAW. <br />
<br />
Your not-so-loyal co-owner, <br />
<br />
KellyAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11435288847709378577noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5936359210404118298.post-69903848785030114002013-01-11T15:57:00.000-05:002013-02-28T20:47:50.948-05:00Workin' for a livin'One of the things I hope to accomplish this year is to find some renewed satisfaction in my work. For the past eight years, I've worked from home as a medical transcriptionist, specifically radiology. For three years now, I've been on an account for a large, very busy hospital. The work never seems to end, and there never seem to be enough transcriptionists to keep the work current on the account. We have a one-hour turn around time (once the doc dictates the report, it must be transcribed and in the hospital system within the hour). This is stressful especially when there's more work than usual, and we (all the transcriptionists as a group) are constantly being barked at about how we are not keeping up or what we're screwing up. Nary a word is ever said if and when we actually do a good job. <br />
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This time last year, I was blessed to have the opportunity to reduce my work to part time hours. The company I am contracted with graciously allowed me to do this rather than put me on another account, so I took this gesture as a sign that I do a good job, that they do need me and want me to stay on the account.<br />
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Still, I'm the kind of person who thrives on praise. I don't necessarily need it to get the work done (obviously) but a pat on the back here and there or even a kind word never hurts. I would even appreciate some kind of report card, negative or positive, just to see how I'm producing overall but we are never provided with this. So, I've been wondering lately if there are better opportunities out there for me. After all, I have been doing this for a while. Since I'm such a fanatic about grammar and punctuation, I have thought that editing might be a next step up, too.<br />
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What I'm finding out in my search is that maybe being 'pigeon holed' into radiology hasn't been such a good thing. <br />
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When I was in transcription school 10 years ago, I learned all different types of transcription reports, medical terminology, English, grammar and punctuation. I was placed in radiology for my externship and just stuck with it through the years. There's a lot that I've forgotten when it comes to acute care, or general medicine. <br />
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So, rather than look for another job right now I've decided to refresh my skills and to also become registered and certified. So, I'm going to hit the books and start an online study course. I've become so complacent over the years, working from home and not having much professional interaction. I've lost confidence in myself and in my abilities to a certain extent. I love what I do for the most part and don't want to give it up. Hopefully this will revive me and renew my passion for my work.<br />
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It's exciting to have a new challenge to look forward to. Wish me luck!<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11435288847709378577noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5936359210404118298.post-63764451757886480542013-01-01T16:57:00.000-05:002013-01-01T17:01:25.874-05:00Happy New Year!<em><span style="font-size: x-small;">"Do not cling to old ways as you step into a new year. Instead, seek My face with an open mind, knowing that your journey with Me involves being transformed by the renewing of your mind". (from <u>Jesus Calling</u>)</span></em><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">It's been the most relaxing of days. I got up to feed the kitties (who both have alarm clocks in their heads for 6:30 a.m., no matter what day it is) but then, I luxuriously went back to bed. I normally will not go back to sleep when I do this, but then woke again at 9:26. How unusual for me - but then again, we didn't go to sleep until 1:30 a.m. (I was trying to be a better sport about staying up to midnight and enjoying bringing in the New Year!) I awoke to find my hub staring at me and telling me about all the funny noises I was making in my sleep, which I thought was kind of sweet that he was observing me.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">It's raining, so not much was planned for today and we didn't get out of our jammies until about 1. We lounged and played Words with Friends in front of the fireplace and watched The Price is Right. A perfect morning.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">I then reluctantly went out in the rain to Publix to get ingredients for a nontraditional New Years dish, a Mexican chicken stew. Along with cornbread and freshly sliced avocado, it was a delicious midday meal on this chilly day. </span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiudJaAOKbuMXLv6Tk1qQYctBOkOk62Xk1E9TfSSPGZL6Lh54UG1YhodjhcyWurRVaZxMHAonYQ863sycZZ8PYz1IClwU3Ui2pxO-t-c25nwszMp4Cczulz_MD9wwbyGKjTq9ch2d3wxR1O/s1600/2013-01-01+16.09.50.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><img border="0" height="212" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiudJaAOKbuMXLv6Tk1qQYctBOkOk62Xk1E9TfSSPGZL6Lh54UG1YhodjhcyWurRVaZxMHAonYQ863sycZZ8PYz1IClwU3Ui2pxO-t-c25nwszMp4Cczulz_MD9wwbyGKjTq9ch2d3wxR1O/s320/2013-01-01+16.09.50.jpg" width="320" /></span></a><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">With my hub still lounging and watching football (go, Gamecocks!) I called my mom to check on her and thankfully, she has had a good couple of days. All is right with the world for now. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">So, with a thankful heart for all we have been blessed with in 2012, I wish everyone a happy and prosperous 2013!</span> Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11435288847709378577noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5936359210404118298.post-76103039223573187672012-12-30T07:23:00.000-05:002012-12-30T07:23:41.726-05:00<em><span style="font-size: x-small;">Show me the right path, O Lord; </span></em><em><span style="font-size: x-small;">point out the road for me to follow. </span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-size: x-small;">Lead me by your truth and teach me, </span></em><em><span style="font-size: x-small;">for you are the God who saves me. </span></em><em><span style="font-size: x-small;">Psalm 25:4-5</span></em><br />
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I am thankful this morning that my mother called me and she asked me for the name and phone number of a doctor who will give her a second opinion. Rather than being angry at me about blowing up, she has a renewed desire to find out what is wrong.<br />
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I thanked God immediately for this change as I know it couldn't have come without His help. <br />
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Why am I amazed when He comes through for me? Why do I feel so unworthy of His love and mercy? He is proving to me that He is here, that He hears me, and that I can depend upon Him.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11435288847709378577noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5936359210404118298.post-22733414337159240212012-12-29T12:12:00.000-05:002012-12-29T12:12:00.763-05:00<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<em><span style="font-size: x-small;">"Consider it pure joy whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perserverance. Perserverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything". James 1:2-4</span></em></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">I pulled this scripture from a previous post. My life seems to be nothing but trials lately. And even though I try to do the right thing to get through these times, life still overwhelms me. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia;">Today I sit here with a stiff neck from stress and an overwhelming feeling of depression. I, a person who has depended upon her faith to get her through most everything, am being crushed under the weight of my own regret.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia;">My parents are in their 70s and getting more feeble by the day. My mother in particular, who has had manageable issues with her spine up until this past August, has been crippled by what should have been a simple surgery to reinforce her arthritic spine. Since mid November, she's been housebound and in what she describes as "horrible pain" from her back into her right thigh. My father, weakened by COPD and on oxygen 24/7, is her caretaker. I am three hours away. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia;">Her doctor, supposively against ordering physical therapy, continues to keep my mother drugged up rather than finding a solution to her pain. Weeks ago, I suggested getting a second opinion but was rebuffed. My parents think that I think they are fools and can't take care of themselves. In the meantime, mom tells us of her crying in pain every morning as if it is something she just has to get used to. This stresses my dad and he encourages her to do nothing but sit. Sitting gets her stiff and the pain just keeps getting worse. They are their own worst enemies. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia;">They have friends, and their church supposively is sending over people to help - but to hear her talk, no one is responding to their needs. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia;">So yesterday, after a phone call of TMI from my mom, I snapped. For the past two weeks, I myself have struggled with the flu, what I think is a bleeding ulcer, a rapid heartbeat, and too much company over the holidays. Yesterday was the first day that no one was here and I could focus on taking Christmas decorations down. I was feeling overwhelmed already from phone calls from both my daughter and sister talking about what mom is doing and saying. So when mom called and shared WAY too much, I lost it. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia;">Now I really don't know what to do other than pray. My heart tells me God sees the big picture and has everything under control. How come I can't just let go and trust Him? The fear that my parents will live out the rest of their lives in pain and without hope is so much to bear. But if God could send His own son to the cross, who could say that their pain or mine is even comparable to that? The key to trusting Him is living without fear. Why is this so hard for me? </span></div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11435288847709378577noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5936359210404118298.post-67928528968296987832012-04-03T15:52:00.000-04:002012-04-03T15:52:10.516-04:00Has it really been that long?<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Wow, I just read my last entry and realized it was almost 10 months ago! Shame on me. I get the lazy blogger award.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">A lot has happened since we've moved but much has stayed the same too. My furry children, Maddy and Mason, are doing great! Mason was diagnosed with kidney disease last year but to be 15 years old, he is doing well. Princess Maddy is healthy and happy as long as she gets lots of attention, her shrimp every day (yes, spoiled, I know) and gets to go outside.</span><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPNgAMMYKO7_veNYHbbF3gzWlip_R0lYDw0VdLOzPhp9uoDMIL24cAWqmwCYc5qYrrLq4ikZv3lRc2CvhrZO_B_IBbsHQ_Mz_CUaKRKl6ye48MhrNufGV3SfNpZ_j9Yo_UCvVhTTWVOGtT/s1600/Maddy+sunbathing+0312.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><img border="0" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPNgAMMYKO7_veNYHbbF3gzWlip_R0lYDw0VdLOzPhp9uoDMIL24cAWqmwCYc5qYrrLq4ikZv3lRc2CvhrZO_B_IBbsHQ_Mz_CUaKRKl6ye48MhrNufGV3SfNpZ_j9Yo_UCvVhTTWVOGtT/s320/Maddy+sunbathing+0312.jpg" width="320" /></span></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: x-small;"> Maddy - Me is sunbathing</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-r_-bXXjegKrSxFnQ5V5RSciEeS5ZJZCKDK4_soUq7hVhkXz74Jrl7YPpLG7YVCwUPifKb9FXG9gAhDsWX4MfqEARCdIhtBlhlZ20icaz4hjUnsoXc05rPwAGtFCWntVBj3NM2nE-Qrr4/s1600/Mason+0312.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-r_-bXXjegKrSxFnQ5V5RSciEeS5ZJZCKDK4_soUq7hVhkXz74Jrl7YPpLG7YVCwUPifKb9FXG9gAhDsWX4MfqEARCdIhtBlhlZ20icaz4hjUnsoXc05rPwAGtFCWntVBj3NM2nE-Qrr4/s320/Mason+0312.JPG" width="240" /></span></a></div><div align="center"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"></span></div><div align="center"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: x-small;">Mason - I'll stay on my heating pad</span></div><div align="center"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">We have settled in well to Greenville, SC. It is beautiful here, and we love the urban lifestyle that we now have. We live three blocks off of Main St. where there is always something going on. We have shops, restaurants, concerts, baseball games, bike trails and parks all within walking distance. </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgVWWnxvJQgKlDbrPjjpDiPkElIXF7nLoqW1PcBbQLKeZyZ22_xa7Ojy7UTUd8RbVKf-BsuzphTn70rZSx2wbmpXKV5wzmoVfvG05B7JtJWzoMpc8Q4nvhBuyR3NZPTPirMic2K4dyUwyvk/s1600/023.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgVWWnxvJQgKlDbrPjjpDiPkElIXF7nLoqW1PcBbQLKeZyZ22_xa7Ojy7UTUd8RbVKf-BsuzphTn70rZSx2wbmpXKV5wzmoVfvG05B7JtJWzoMpc8Q4nvhBuyR3NZPTPirMic2K4dyUwyvk/s320/023.JPG" width="320" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Petting the boar's nose downtown </span></div><br />
<div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Georgia;">Breaking news...I just turned 50 years old! We went to Cancun to celebrate... </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKEyeXNIeuM0-GzG9PWEBa8VHjD8ue91WGkrlvqLQPdwVfuzrOy-0p4jyeu4FKaXqybnuQfKRSjO4eLuBc2lBluGHE4a_eV6VadDAQG0fHJ9Bq0oRx9k7OJjksY8z5eIJVT7Au89uOcKrw/s1600/Cancun+0312+(65).JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="212" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKEyeXNIeuM0-GzG9PWEBa8VHjD8ue91WGkrlvqLQPdwVfuzrOy-0p4jyeu4FKaXqybnuQfKRSjO4eLuBc2lBluGHE4a_eV6VadDAQG0fHJ9Bq0oRx9k7OJjksY8z5eIJVT7Au89uOcKrw/s320/Cancun+0312+(65).JPG" width="320" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: x-small;">Sunrise in Cancun</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Georgia;">...and then visited Georgia for what turned out to be a <strong>surprise</strong> party courtesy of my beautiful daughter.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfOTkKAKpdZbmigPkyRSzjZsVNLrKk6H-0DwkVOefuk4XdGMlj7rtMWmVtdbJoajnWK4bOLdMzYXu5N5YcxajSJHcsTfQZCtk3mm4bhfykpokHRhXWhJdQaaRb7Oxt3hw-wWrfjvpMYGAl/s1600/033112+(5).JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><img border="0" height="212" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfOTkKAKpdZbmigPkyRSzjZsVNLrKk6H-0DwkVOefuk4XdGMlj7rtMWmVtdbJoajnWK4bOLdMzYXu5N5YcxajSJHcsTfQZCtk3mm4bhfykpokHRhXWhJdQaaRb7Oxt3hw-wWrfjvpMYGAl/s320/033112+(5).JPG" width="320" /></span></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: x-small;">Yep, they got me </span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">On the homefront, my hubby has gone from working at home for many years to now working in an office. Working at home and being removed from the office politics is easier but sometimes it keeps you out of the loop. He is fully in the loop now, and much is being uncovered. If you read my posts from the past, you know we had a side business that failed. We've trusted God throughout this journey and He is showing us that He can use that failure for good. All of the knowledge that my hub gained from that failed experience is now being used to make things better for his employer. I'm proud of him for what he is accomplishing for them, even if he doesn't get the pat on the back (yet) that he deserves.</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Georgia;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">I'm still working as a radiology transcriptionist but happily went part time as of the first of the year. I'm also working with my husband's company to process book orders for retailers. I'm able to do both of these jobs from home, which I love!</span></span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Georgia;">That's all the news for now. I will try to stay current! </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11435288847709378577noreply@blogger.com0